Why our young men keep killing us to initiate themselves. — alchemists journal

“These young men are a mirror for who we have become. They simply pick up the tools of manhood we provide and use them as they were designed.”   There was a tradition among my ancestors, up until about the 12th century, called the Fianna. If you were a young man, maybe 14 or so, […]

Why our young men keep killing us to initiate themselves. — alchemists journal

7 thoughts on “Why our young men keep killing us to initiate themselves. — alchemists journal

    1. Maybe to some extent, but not entirely. There are good points to remember that some of us might have forgotten. Or maybe it makes us stop and pause and say something kind to a young man we see while out and about. In many ways I consider myself shy, but I’m not too shy to say a sincerely nice thing to strangers. If I like someone’s shirt or the way they handled something, I say something. It’s the opposite of microaggressions. Maybe we should call them “microkindnesses?” Women don’t often give much thought to complimenting other women on blouses or whatnot, but men and boys like compliments too. If we want a kinder, more sustainable society, we need to encourage it by words, actions and acknowledgment of what people are doing right. One of the common threads of mass shooters is low self-esteem wrapped in anger because they don’t know how else to work through it.

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  1. He makes some good points, but I agree he’s preaching to the choir. If someone on Fox News would say this, it might make a difference. We need a reset on masculinity. But we’re moving on the opposite direction, back to repressing women and rewarding men with no conscience or empathy. (K)

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    1. The worst we can do is give up and be silent. We must find our strengths and work in ways that matter to each of us. Collective action is more than marching in the streets and letter writing campaigns, it’s in the little things we choose to do each and every day. If I didn’t believe that this blog would not exist. 🙂

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      1. I’m certainly not silent–but my Congressional and State representatives all support gun restrictions and a flexible definition of sexuality. The people I know who disagree with me are not going to change their mind because of anything I say or do. Yes, we can treat all people with respect, but wouldn’t you try to do that anyway? That’s not not going to change anyone’s mind either. I don’t patronize violence, but as long as those things that encourage it make money, nothing will change. If the deaths of children in school can’t convince people that there need to be gun laws, I don’t know what can.

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  2. Thank you for posting that link. I was interested in his subtitle ‘Young men need to dance.’ I think there certainly is something in that. At 62 years old now I am not a young man but I still love dancing! But as regards gun restrictions, ultimately gun laws do not change hearts. Those that press for them ignore this basic fact. Those who want to fight, will always find something to use.

    Indeed, since when have laws done anything except make out something that should, or perhaps more often, shouldn’t be done?

    As say in a comment of yours “it’s in the little things we choose to do each and every day.” to which I might add, that is the acts of love and kindness.

    The lack of fathers in boys and young men’s lives is a critical factor in all this, divorce and single parenting have made this a serious problem. Again, your comment re complimenting men and boys is a good one.

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    1. I find so many things interwoven particularly when it comes to social and environmental issues that sometimes it’s hard to articulate. When I came across Tim’s post I didn’t need to keep grasping for cohesion in my own thoughts. He’d done a fine job himself and I wanted to share that.

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